Author: 年终 / Nian Zhong
Translator: Kinky || https://kinkytranslations.com/
Chapter 26: Employee Code
Shian’s working hours started at 9 a.m., but the two received a call from Fang Yuanyuan at 7.
Fang Yuanyuan said that Shian’s guards were particularly strict. They still need to go through the final process of joining the company before they can clock in and out normally. The two only had time to eat half an apple and fill up a cup of soy milk before they left home in a hurry.
Zhong Chengshuo’s home wasn’t far from the subway station. Today was when Lord Ghost King finally experienced human morning rush hour for the first time.
In order to avoid trouble, Zhong Chengshuo prepared a mask for Yin Ren. When he got off at the bus station, Yin Ren’s eyes were glazed over, and his mask was tilted. The steam bun he had been carrying was squeezed into mush.
Fortunately, Yin Ren didn’t need much sleep, so he didn’t struggle to wake up. He had to say that the apples Zhong Chengshuo bought were delicious; at least they saved his mood along the way.
However, his only remaining good mood came to an abrupt end after entering the Shian building…
Fang Yuanyuan confiscated Yin Ren’s lamb and carrot steamed buns.
“Miss Fang…” Yin Ren wanted to stupidly protest.
“I’m sorry, Mr. Yin. Since we’ve entered the office area of Shian, food is not allowed here.”
“But isn’t this a bit wasteful?” How could Shian have more rules than Zhong Chengshuo’s home?
Fang Yuanyuan put the steam buns in her pocket and put on her signature smile. “Don’t worry. There will be other employees that’ll help solve it.”
She led them around seven or eight turns before walking into an isolated conference room.
The small meeting room was separated by glass and had two rows of sofas. Which could seat a maximum of six. It was full of green plants, and there was a large water cooler in the corner.
The water dispenser seemed to have been used for a long time, as the plastic lever was a washed-out yellow. There was a row of half-used disposable paper cups stacked by the water dispenser. The cooler was half full of clean water. The waterspout seemed to be a little damaged, as it kept making a ticking sound.
“It’s not easy for the two of you to get here. Please be sure to abide by the staff rules. A more detailed manual will be sent to your inbox later. The information on this piece of paper is the most important, so keep it in mind.”
Fang Yuanyuan’s voice was sweet as usual. She had a new manicure and colorful contact lenses, and she was wearing a long dress that went down to her ankles.
“Remember it, firmly.” She emphasized again with a smile.
Then she took out the document bag and gave them each a piece of paper with a brand-new official work ID. The original work ID was taken away and cut in half with a simple click.
“Mr. Yin, if you have something you don’t understand, you can ask me anytime.” Fang Yuanyuan threw the remnants of the cut ID into the file bag and clapped her hands as she added this last sentence.
Perhaps it was because the water temperature had dropped, but the water dispenser suddenly made a rumbling sound, and the green light on the dispenser turned red.
Zhong Chengshuo pursed his lips and glanced at the water dispenser.
“After reading the employee rules, be sure to sign them. You can go to the cafeteria for a meal later. Your official work card can be used as a meal card.” Fang Yuanyuan’s tone was brisk. “We have mini mushroom wontons this morning. You can eat together after you’re done.”
Hearing that there was a cafeteria with food, Yin Ren quickly scanned the contents of the paper.
He was sure he could basically understand it, but the content of the so-called “employee rules” was a bit weird…
[Code of Conduct for Employees of Shian Corp—Non-science Posts (Black Seal)]
[Job instructions: Emergency Management Department Internal Line: 509
- Only sealed packaged beverages such as bottled water are allowed in the office area, or you can bring your own drinking water provided by the dorms. Please do not drink water in the office area. Violators will be punished. Please eat in the company cafeteria. It is strictly forbidden to bring food into the office area.
- Personal belongings are permitted. The size cannot exceed that of a child. Coats with no more than 1m in length can be worn, and the storage of such clothing shall not exceed 24 hours. It is strictly prohibited to take the initiative to bring live animals into the office area (including, but not limited to, potted plants, pets, children, ect.). If you bring animal/human corpses into the office area due to work reasons, please give us 12 hours in advance notice.
- If a colleague (or other foreign body) behaves abnormally (including, but not limited to, abnormal body shape, abnormal facial features, and weird speech and behavior) is observe in the office area, please do not continue to observe and resume working normally.
- Trespassing into the security room is strictly prohibited. If you want to enter, please ensure that at least one science post employee is with you.
- If you need to leave the company for 7 days or more (including personal leave), please bring the company’s registered spirit weapon and clock in when you return to the office area. If you don’t show the spirit weapon, you are prohibited from entering. If the spirit weapon is lost for any reason, please contact the Emergency Handling Department immediately.]
Yin Blade pondered for a while, then turned to Zhong Chengshuo. “Can I take a look at yours?”
“Yes, let’s exchange.” Zhong Chengshuo appeared to be lost in thought and handed Yin Ren his paper absentmindedly.
Yin Ren glanced at his partner’s expression carefully. After Zhong Chengshuo had finished reading the paper, there were still no changes to that scholarly face.
But the rules he handed over were also not normal.
Sure enough, their job categories were different, and the version of the employee code was also different. Zhong Chengshuo was in the “science post”. The content had changed beginning with the second rule…
- You can bring personal belongings. The size of personal belongings shall not exceed that of a child. Coats with no more than 1m in length can be worn, and the storage of such clothing shall not exceed 24 hours. You can bring potted plants. If the appearance of the potted plant you see is different from that described by your colleagues, please contact the security personnel immediately.
- If you smell an odor in the office area or see unexplained stains of unknown origin and the duration of their existence is more than 10 minutes, regardless of whether you are the only one observing, please contact the security personnel immediately.
- If a colleague (or other foreign body) behaves abnormally (including, but not limited to, abnormal body shape, abnormal facial features, and weird speech and behavior) is observe in the office area, no matter how long the abnormality lasts, do not judge without authorization. Please go to the security room immediately and contact the Emergency Handling Department.
- If you need to leave the company for 7 days or more (including personal leave), please set the key via the company’s intranet before leaving…]
Yin Ren: “……”
He was enlightened. In a nutshell, as a reserve employee in a non-science post, he just had to eat and sleep on time and mind his own business. Science post employees were just the opposite. They had to wade through all the bullshit and take care of everything.
How miserable. He had started to sympathize with Zhong Chengshuo.
…The water dispenser was really annoying. Yin Ren quietly closed half his ear canal and automatically reduced the ambient volume.
Not far away, Fang Yuanyuan was still standing there. She stood smiling as she stared at them affectionately.
“Come, follow me to the security room.” When Yin Ren finished reading the two papers, Zhong Chengshuo abruptly stood up.
Fang Yuanyuan became a little confused. “Hey, hey, Xiao Zhong, you haven’t signed yet, and there are still things I have to say before we finish—”
“Both versions of the code of conduct have repeatedly emphasized that water cannot be drunk in the office area.” As Zhong Chengshuo spoke, he pointed to the dripping water dispenser.
“…Why is there such a thing in the conference room?”
There was silence in the conference room.
“Security personnel wouldn’t make this kind of mistake. According to the code of conduct, it can be judged as a ‘foreign body’.” Zhong Chengshuo spoke slowly, emphasizing his speech.
Fang Yuanyuan’s smile became a bit more awkward. “Uh, Mr. Zhong, that’s the test product that the administration put here. Attention to detail is a good thing. If you’re not at ease, I’ll go to the security room with you later. In short, let’s finish the process first.”
The water was still dripping, little by little. The disposable paper cup that was catching it was filled, and the water gradually overflowed along the mouth of the cup.
Yin Ren looked around but couldn’t see anything wrong with the water dispenser, but he suspected there was something afoot. Lord Ghost King crossed his arms and decided to stand on the sidelines.
After a few seconds of silence, Zhong Chengshuo tensed his body and spoke again without any wavering in his tone. “It’s a ‘foreign body’. This is my judgment.”
This sentence wasn’t a statement but rather a kind of test for Fang Yuanyuan.
Seeing his attitude, Fang Yuanyuan’s smile widened a bit.
She grinned and clapped her hands. “Very good, very good. Few newcomers would be alert at this level.”
“This is a small test. There will be additional bonuses if you pass. Now, take the employee code of conduct and sign it…”
Zhong Chengshuo turned to Yin Ren and said in a firm tone, “Follow me.”
“I’ve already said it’s a test, Mr. Zhong. Please cooperate with me.” Fang Yuanyuan patted her forehead. “You two are in the penalty period for violating the rules. If you violate the rules again during this period, I’ll be scolded by Minister Li.”
Zhong Chengshuo turned a deaf ear to what she said. Yin Ren glanced at Fang Yuanyuan and stood up slowly.
[No matter how long the abnormality lasts, do not judge without authorization. Please go to the security room immediately and contact the Emergency Handling Department.]
Zhong Chengshuo was putting the code of conduct into practice.
Yin Ren probably understood what was going on. Now that they were partners, the two of them were in the same boat, so he was justified in acting with his partner—even if it was explicitly against the rules, Shian couldn’t punish him because of this.
“Let’s go,” Yin Ren said crisply.
Zhong Chengshuo stretched out his hand and grabbed Yin Ren’s wrist through his sleeve. He ignored Fang Yuanyuan’s warning, dragged Yin Ren all the way back, and headed straight to the security room.
The security room was at the entrance of the building, which made it quite conspicuous. Zhong Chengshuo sprinted quickly as he kept his grip on Yin Ren’s hand while using his other hand to make an internal call.
At the moment they opened the security room, both their phones and applause sounded simultaneously.
In the security room, besides two security guards in uniform, Fang Yuanyuan and an unfamiliar man were standing there.
As if the scene had just been replayed, Fang Yuanyuan smiled and applauded. “Xiang Jiang, what did I tell you? The quality of this newcomer is really good.”
Zhong Chengshuo was stunned. He let go of Yin Ren’s wrist. “That was…”
Another “Fang Yuanyuan” caught up from behind. The stiff smile on her face had not yet dissipated. She stopped at the door of the security room and stared straight at Zhong Chengshuo and Yin Ren without blinking.
“It’s a spirit weapon made by me. Isn’t it realistic?” Fang Yuanyuan walked to her “twin” and grimaced.
‘It is really realistic,’ Yin Ren thought to himself.
The spirit weapon moved naturally, and its breathing and heartbeat were well imitated. Its hair was probably from Fang Yuanyuan herself and was soaked in the aura of the living so that most ordinary evil things couldn’t distinguish it. Cultivators referred to this as a “flesh figurine” thousands of years ago, and it was one of the most difficult spirit weapons to create.
This girl’s level of craftsmanship was quite high.
Zhong Chengshuo clenched his phone tightly. He still hadn’t disconnected the internal call.
“You can stop the call. Emergency Management Department, Xiang Jiang.” The unfamiliar man in the room connected the call and motioned for Zhong Chengshuo on the other line. “I’m certifying that all this is indeed a test. Continue.”
When he said that, he propped up his eyes and glanced at the two men; his gaze lingered on Yin Ren for a few seconds longer.
Yin Ren, likewise, was also observing him.
Xiang Jiang looked less than 30. He wore a flurry of unmatched items that had no aesthetic appeal. There were mismatched earrings, socks, and shoes. He was unusually thin and could barely be considered handsome. His complexion didn’t look very healthy, and his eyes were cloudy like those of an old man.
As a cultivator, this person could be considered a master, but he was much weaker than Fu Xingchuan. He had an extremely strong evil qi on his body, most likely because he had coexisted with it for a long time.
Fang Yuanyuan patted Xiang Jiang. “Xiang Jiang, our genius ghost master of Haigu. Xiao Yin, this is your future senior.”
Hearing the word “genius”, Xiang Jiang showed an unconcealed expression of disgust.
“I have limited time, so hurry up.” He casually spat out his words and averted his eyes, obviously not interested in the two newcomers.
Fang Yuanyuan seemed to be used to this. She pulled back the topic. “This is the induction practice of Shian, and you’ve done a stellar job. Zhong Chengshuo wasn’t confused, and Yin Ren also chose to trust his partner. If you guys hadn’t recognized the water cooler trap in time, you’ve probably be a little frightened—”
She made a casual gesture, and the throat of the spirit weapon beside her made a few “cracking” sounds. Suddenly, the head split open and exposed two large hyacinth bouquets.
“Congratulations on your official entry to Shian!” Fang Yuanyuan distributed the bouquets to the two of them.
Yin Ren: “…..” Was there a misconception? Miss Fang’s sense of humor was slightly morbid.
Zhong Chengshuo took the bouquet, broke through the casserole* and asked, “Why can’t you drink water in the office area?”
*Metaphor referring to investigating the root of things.
“Ah, well before, water dispensers could still be used.” Fang Yuanyuan straightened her hair. “Then there was a vicious cognitive pollution—at that time, Shian introduced a patrol machine, and the machine found that the water dispenser that the employees had been using for over half a year was actually the body of a missing colleague.”
Yin Ren and Zhong Chengshuo: “…”
Yin Ren: “Then the water at that time…”
“Corpse water, followed by residues of who knows what.” Fang Yuanyuan smiled bitterly. “The worst thing was that the deceased was still alive when he disappeared. According to the judgment of experts at the time, he probably thought he was a water dispenser.”
Yin Ren didn’t understand, but he was still greatly shocked.
Zhong Chengshuo: “Then what was in the meeting room just now…?”
“Oh, that.” Fang Yuanyuan waved her hand dismissively. “That’s an antique water dispenser I had a colleague bring in.”
Zhong Chengshuo breathed a sigh of relief.
“The rule ‘you can’t bring personal belongings the size of a living person’ is also to reduce the number of incidents like this,” Fang Yuanyuan calmly added. “After all, we have a colleague who disappeared in the office area two years ago and hasn’t been found yet.”
Yin Ren slowly put down the bouquet, suddenly feeling that the thing he was holding in his hands was a bit hot.
He thought sadly that there was no job in the world that could earn a lot of money with less work.
“In short, the employee code of conduct is written to protect you. It’s important to remember this. Now there’s one last step—Xiang Jiang, please take our new Black Seal to pick up his spirit weapon.”
“Keep up.” Xiang Jiang opened the door of the security room with an impatient face.
Zhong Chengshuo, who was still holding his bouquet, said, “I’m going too?”
“Since you two are field partners, it’s best to know more about each other.” Xiang Jiang snorted. “You science posts should pay more attention and make sure the people around you haven’t been replaced.”
“…” Zhong Chengshuo slowly put down the bouquet, and his expression gradually became complicated.
The place where registered spirit weapons were selected wasn’t far from the security room. It looked like an abandoned warehouse.
Rows of elevated buildings were filled with scattered debris, many of which had been specially packed in cardboard boxes. Those sundries weren’t big. This wasn’t so much a regular spirit weapon warehouse than a storage room for goods from a second-hand market.
There were dirty pens, pencils, utility knives, and rulers covered with dust. A bear keychain that was missing an eye, the cover of a notebook that was stained with suspicious spots, a calculator that had a screen that kept flickering, and nothing looked new on the entire shelf.
Yin Ren began to miss his dagger spirit weapon fiercely. Compared to these modern rags, his dagger was exquisite and more atmospheric.
Unfortunately, he could only see it in a museum now.
“Do I get to pick one myself?” he asked bitterly.
The focus of Zhong Chengshuo was elsewhere. “Are there anomalies in these items?”
There were a few thousand pieces of “scrap” here, and he didn’t know how long Shian had recorded their anomalies.
Xiang Jiang gave them a sideways glance. “These things are not worthy of being recorded as anomalies. They are the lowest-level inferior spirit weapons and can only be used as proof of identity for employees.”
Zhong Chengshuo curiously picked up a fountain pen, opened the cap, and took a look—except for a line of identification numbers engraved on it, the pen was no different from other fountain pens.
He turned the pen’s body and found a warning label on the pen holder: [A small probability the ink in the pen will turn blood red.]
Zhong Chengshuo: “…” Objectively speaking, this thing was pretty useless.
He put the pen back in place, speechless.
Yin Ren was holding a tape measure that would “100% cut your hands when pulled out”. “Then I’ll just take whatever…”
“No.” Xiang Jiang leaned against the entrance of the warehouse. “The spirit weapon has to respond to you, so it will be more difficult for the outside world to forge it.”
Yin Ren: “What if it doesn’t respond to me?”
Yin Ren suppressed his power thoroughly. For these spirit weapons, there was basically no difference between him and Zhong Chengshuo. Even the flesh figurine couldn’t detect his abnormality. If there was a spirit weapon that could detect his anomalies, then such a thing would never appear in this ghost of a place.
Xiang Jiang ignored him. “Walk back and forth along the shelf and see if there are any spirit weapons that resonate with you.”
Yin Ren had to pace slowly between the shelves. His mind had already drifted to the cafeteria in the park. It was almost 9 now, and he didn’t know what kind of breakfast Shian’s cafeteria would serve…
Just like that, Yin Ren wandered around the warehouse while counting all the dishes in his head.
“Ring ring ring—”
Yin Ren subconsciously touched his pocket. How weird. He should have muted his phone when he walked into the building earlier.
“Ring ring ring—”
A default ringtone from a cellphone came from the pile of debris. Yin Ren wasn’t sure if he was thinking too much, but the ringtone sounded slightly weak.
“Ring ring ring ring ring ring—”
The ringing kept going until he finally stopped in front of a pile of debris that looked like a mountain of garbage.
The author has something to say:
Xiao Zhong & Xiao Yin: This company of yours is really harmful. _(:з”∠)_
Happy New Year.
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6 thoughts on “Evil As Humans Ch26”
Thank you for the update ❤️💯
Thanks for the update! Happy new year!
happy new year!! 🎊
Thanks for the chapters!
I still need to watch the alien movies. I’ve seen the game and read enough about it in various novels that I basically know the plot, but I still wanna watch them. Basically a classic at this point!
Thank you for the chapter!