Happy Doomsday Ch118

Author: 年终 / Nian Zhong

Translator: Kinky || https://kinkytranslations.com/

Chapter 118: :DA:D

Tang Yibu had always been accustomed to reserving some of his cards. He might perhaps use three, but never five. He had always been walking in this twisted world for many years and had never encountered a truly uncontrollable situation.

But now he had.

In order to ensure that his breathing, heartbeat, and expression weren’t abnormal, Tang Yibu almost exhausted all his strength.

After knowing that “Ruan Lijie” was a human being, he made an inference about the identity of his mysterious partner.

If that person was a human, he would have reached the hiding place of the S-type Prototype one step ahead of himself and destroyed it. Combined with the other party’s physical condition at the time, there was only one possibility—”Ruan Lijie” was likely to have slept in a hidden dormant warehouse before he was awakened according to pre-settings.

From this perspective, it was excusable for Mr. Ruan to lie to him. Whether he belonged to the rebel forces or not, if the other party really had a closer connection with Ruan Xian, it was reasonable to be wary of him.

It stood to reason that only Ruan Xian could open the sealing mechanism there, and he would never trap his own people in it. Then, in order to leave the secret room where the Prototype was stored, it was also possible for Professor Ruan to entrust part of his memory to this human being.

This could also explain the strange similarity between the other party and Ruan Xian.

…But this set of logic only existed in theory.

Ruan Xian, in his own cognition, wouldn’t do that. Professor Ruan knew how decisive and cruel mechanical life was, and how natural life was reverent.

Professor Ruan must have some compelling circumstances and needed to enact complicated follow-ups for the S-type prototype. At least for now, Tang Yibu couldn’t see the necessity of this kind of setting, which was no different from arranging the dead.

In general, if it was simply destroyed, the battle would be too big. As the backbone of the specially strengthened rebel army, “Ruan Lijie’s” personality was too mismatched—as a human, “Ruan Lijie” had excellent intelligence as well as a cold personality to the point that it could be said he was unkind. This kind of person wasn’t suitable for training subordinates or leaders.

For those who owe him a favor, his Mr. Ruan would be relatively active in assisting. For the rest of the time, Mr. Ruan’s behavior was more suitable for words such as “stubborn”, “abnormal”, and “my way or the highway”.

Nothing made sense.

This person was like a sharp knife, piercing into his world for no reason, cutting out the set of logic he carefully maintained.

“In my memory, I am Ruan Xian.” That was what the man said just now.


Tang Yibu rarely came to conclusions recklessly, but this thought sprang up instinctively. The other party’s memory must have been modified, and there must be a deeper plan or conspiracy in it…

However, the more he thought about it, the more he felt that everything was just a forced argument he was using for denial. He took a deep breath, remained expressionless, and focused his attention back on the other party.

What a fascinating puzzle. After those words, the puzzle turned into fog, diffusing through his frantically spinning thoughts.

His Mr. Ruan’s face was very close. Their foreheads were against each other, and Tang Yibu could still feel the other’s body temperature rising after intense exercise. He still remembered the touch of the other’s skin and the details of his trembling muscles. The man just looked at him with a smile, his beautiful eyes slightly bent, with a hint of redness in the corners of those eyes.

His breath was also extremely hot.

‘Impossible,’ Tang Yibu repeated in his heart. The other party seemed to be waiting for him to give an answer, but his brain was in a mess so he couldn’t give a decent response.

He must wait to find out the general facts before jumping to conclusion. This person wasn’t necessary Mr. Ruan… Not necessarily…

[What should I call you?] More than a decade ago, he had asked Ruan Xian this, who was sitting in his wheelchair.

[I found out you’ll use honorifics when you really want to get my feedback.] In his memory, Ruan Xian touched his chin. [Is there any problem with the title ‘Administrator’?]

[I don’t like it.] At that time, his thoughts were extremely simple—even those stupid old systems would call their masters administrators, but the relationship between himself and Ruan Xian wasn’t ordinary. He didn’t know why, but he wanted a special name.

[Then you can call me Mr. Ruan or Professor Ruan like everyone else.] Ruan Xian didn’t get too entangled in this issue. He was busy stealing gummy candy.

[I still don’t like it.] He was still NUL-00 at the time and continued stubbornly. These two names were not special enough, although he didn’t understand why he wanted to be “special”.

[…Then what do you want to call me?] Ruan Xian smiled, and suddenly his body twitched. He knew that the other party’s old problem had flared up again, so he waited until Ruan Xian slowed down his breathing before giving his answer.

At first, he compared countless data points and came up with a relatively satisfactory answer. [Breeder.]

Ruan Xian coughed from laughter and almost choked.

[No.] Before Ruan Xian finished coughing, he rejected the proposal himself. [You haven’t fed me fresh water in the true sense, nor have you bathed or groomed me.]

Seeing Ruan Xian laughing hard enough, he cast a few “:D” in the air, and then continued with a synthetic tone that wasn’t very emotional.

[Father.] He said.

Ruan Xian’s smile slowly disappeared.

[Father.] Tang Yibu repeated it, secretly proud of his newly discovered title for a while. [You are my creator. You have taught me all the knowledge about this world, and your gender is male. I think the title father is very appropriate.]

[Sorry, I can’t accept that title.] Ruan Xian’s tone was rarely stiff after the smile disappeared.

Tang Yibu admitted that he was a little unhappy at the time. He didn’t make a sound and cast a very huge “oh” in the air.

[Why?] After a long time, he finally asked, trying to change the other party’s mind.

[It’s still too early for you. When you study human feelings more deeply, I will tell you it as a case study.] Ruan Xian waved his hand, and the stiffness in his tone quickly disappeared. [I won’t change my mind, NUL-00.]

He knew that once Ruan Xian really made a decision, it would be futile to entangle him any longer, so he paused for a few seconds and cast a bigger “oh” in the air in dissatisfaction.

Ruan Xian’s smile returned to his face, and he reached out and patted the huge chassis he used to dissipate heat. [Don’t be angry. How about I stay with you for a while today?]

[Okay.] He threw out a standard synthetic word and suddenly had an idea. This time he still didn’t explicitly call that person, but just threw out two simple smiley faces, indicating that his mood had recovered…


Ruan Xian, who he knew well, had been sitting in a wheelchair, looking like he had been gnawed by illness. That person never talked about his past but was willing to open up part of his heart to him.

His conceptual “father”.

Until that sudden farewell, Ruan Xian had always been “gentle” to him. Although that gentleness was more like the instinct of two people who were about to freeze to death meeting in a snowfield and had to warm each other in order to live.

Since he claimed to be Ruan Xian, why didn’t he say goodbye in the first place, father?

Unfortunately, he couldn’t ask him that. Tang Yibu bit his lip. “Ruan Lijie” identity wasn’t clear yet and his mind was too keen. Once he was caught by the other party, he was likely to be exposed as NUL-00. That fact was what he was hiding at the top of his pyramid, and no mistakes could be allowed.

So he could only prevaricate with other answers for the time being.

He no longer pressed against the other party’s forehead but stretched out his arms and hooked them around the other’s waist, then kissed him again. He exhausted all the knowledge in his mind as his tongue was entangled in a battle, frantically plundering the other’s breath, until the body in his arm slowly softened and trembled before losing balance.

“…I’m a little confused about what this response mean.” His Mr. Ruan sat on the ground and gasped for a while. It took a while before he regained his voice.

“The reward for exchanging information.” Tang Yibu turned his back and walked to the bushes where π was hiding, making sure his expression couldn’t be seen. “You seem to like them very much.”

Having said that, he pulled out the trembling iron bead from the bushes. The iron bead shrunk in the shell of the assistant robot and let out a long, crying “gwah”, followed by short and frantic “gwahs”.

Tang Yibu simply nodded in response while holding it in his arms. He took out two sets of sealed and compressed clothes from the bottom of the assistant robot’s empty shell. He briefly soothed the iron bead for a while before putting it back into the shell again.

“According to the degree to which someone is endless, I’m not the only one who likes these things. Isn’t it inappropriate to treat this as a unilateral reward?”

Ruan Xian stared at the other’s back and raised his voice slightly. The other party’s kissing skills were as superb as his other skills. He was kissed until he went soft that he had to simply sit down on the lawn.

A few hours later, the fish in the stagnant water had no strength to continue struggling and could only breathe with difficulty. Ruan Xian glanced at it, grabbed its tail, and threw it into the nearest drain.

Tang Yibu’s reaction was a bit different from what he had expected. He expected that the other party might think about it for a while, but he didn’t expect Tang Yibu, who usually was careful when examining the ingredient list of convenience foods, to not ask him any questions at this time.

Instead, the android gave him an inexplicable kiss.

Tang Yibu and the forces behind him seemed to be more interesting than he thought. He rubbed his wet lower lip for a while, and as soon as he was about to conduct a comprehensive analysis of the existing information, he was hit in the chest by a new set of restraint clothes.

“Also specially prepared clothes?” Ruan Xian raised his eyebrows. He could probably guess its purpose. But for some reason, he really wanted to tease Tang Yibu now.

“It is very likely that we will fight, and the clothes are likely to be damaged.” Tang Yibu himself put on a white coat. His face was stiff like a wax figure. π, who was wearing the assistant robot shell, was still shaking and spinning at his feet, as if it had drank too much wine. “Put it on quickly. We have to get out of here immediately.”

“It’s not impossible to talk tomorrow.” After all, the surveillance video was already forged by the other party, and he wasn’t sure of the pre-arranged timing. Ruan Xian had no intention of delaying this negotiation. “What have you prepared?”

“Fire.” Tang Yibu still looked like his brain was overloaded.

“Quite appropriate.” Ruan Xian patted the shell of the iron bead with his hand, and the latter crooned nervously. “What did you say to π just now?”

“You screamed too loudly. It thought you were hurt.” The culprit replied sternly, staring at a point in the air in front of him while tying the buttons on his white coat one by one. “I told it you are okay.”

“I see.” Ruan Xian didn’t feel much shame about it. He patted the anxiously shaking iron bead. “After all, the opportunity is rare. Next time, it may not be so convenient to make a sound.”

Tang Yibu’s movement of buttoning stopped.

Then he hugged the iron bead and strode ahead. Ruan Xian shrugged, adjusted the last concealed buckle on the restraint clothes, and followed in the same stride.

After fighting in every sense and shaking out the facts, Ruan Xian discovered a new kind of fun—it was fun to tease Tang Yibu while his head was down.

There was a slight crackling behind them, and a flash of fire cut through the darkness. Ruan Xian roughly calculated that, considering Tang Yibu probably manipulated the fire protection system, in another 20 minutes, the botanical garden would turn into a sea of fire, completely burning all traces they left behind.

When he was thinking about whether the fish he threw into the drain would survive, Tang Yibu suddenly stopped, and Ruan Xian almost bumped into his back.

Before Ruan Xian could say, “What’s the matter”, Tang Yibu turned around solemnly and stretched out a hand to him.

“According to my original arrangement, if your body is still ‘alive’, I will send you back to your room, and then wait for someone to find out that your brain is abnormal.” Tang Yibu’s voice was more serious than his expression.

“Very reasonable.” Ruan Xian held up his arms, as if in a sign of surrender to the other party.

“But you still have the ability to think now, and I need to be in closer contact with you, so I decided to go back with you to your room.”

“Then what?”

“I need to make Gong Siyi believe that we have become regular sex partners… or that we have gotten together.” In a rare moment, Tang Yibu didn’t look directly at Ruan Xian but at his outstretched hands.

“Based on what just happened, this isn’t a lie.” Ruan Xian still didn’t know what the android was planning.

“At present, I cannot accept the identity you claim, nor can I immediately resolve my own emotional problems.” Tang Yibu was standing in the white corridor. The silver moonlight hit him through the window, causing his inhuman aura of an android to become a bit heavier. “But assuming you are really Ruan Xian, I have a reason to keep you tied to me.”

“…I don’t like the word tie very much.”

“So I thought about it for a while. In addition to the intelligence constraints between us, I want to add something else to make sure you wouldn’t want to run away.”

Those golden eyes blinked, and Tang Yibu’s gaze was more serious than ever before.

“You and I are attracted to each other… or rather, we like each other… and the bed is quite spacious. According to human information, proper intimacy can weaken your willingness to leave.”

“So?” Ruan Xian had a subtle premonition.

“I think we should cement this intimacy,” Tang Yibu said in a tone similar to making a report. “This is a brand new cooperation. Let’s shake on it, Mr. Ruan.”


“In order to ensure authenticity, we need to do it in a bit to make sure that Gong Siyi finds out. Your answer is directly related to the degree of naturalness of our performance. If it doesn’t work, I can consider other parties—”

Ruan Xian didn’t shake his hand. He held it with his backhand and bit Tang Yibu’s slender fingers lightly.

“Sure,” he said.

“But this is really the worst courtship I’ve ever seen.”

The author has something to say:

How could Tang only be confused in one chapter!

But he cares more about Ruan’s identity…Even if Ruan is really his father, he won’t be panicked because he slept with his father (…).

Tang: Is it dad? Is it dad? This is different from the dad in my memory! Doesn’t make sense! (Confusion)

Ruan: Is this the android’s downtime (.

Kinky Thoughts:

LMAO. Tang Yibu needs to work on his pickup lines… Well, it’ll still work on me. Ahhhh we all know what’s coming up next!

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